10/26/2010 ***Goodbye never stops hurting.*** This is the beautiful woman who gave birth to me and then spent the remainder of her life making loving sacrifices for me. When I was that little girl in the green dress, I didn't understand the sacrifices my mom made for me and I certainly didn't appreciate them. Like every other girl, I promised I'd never be like my mom. Then I had my own children and I began to understand those sacrifices, and I fell head over heals in love with her. How could I ever stand to become anything other than the woman who loved me so much? No matter how I disappointed her, she just kept loving me and placing my desires before her own needs. And what did I give back to her? A few crayon pictures, a good report card or two, maybe some birthday and Mothers' Day cards and the only grandchildren she lived long enough to meet. She was 53 years old when her time with me came to an end 16 years ago tonight. In those last moments, we gave one final gift to each-other. We held each others' hands and prayed together as she drew her last breath. Nearly a year later, I was allowed to go through her things. I should have known that among those things, I'd find the refrigerator art, the report cards and probably every card I had ever given to her along with treasured pictures of her grandchildren. And over the years, pictures from her life have made their way to me like a gentle mercy that reminds me of a love that can never be replaced. Goodbye never stops hurting. But I know that one day, she will hold me again and the hurt will be gone. Mom is in all of these pictures. The group shot on the bottom is from my Aunt Kathy's high school graduation in 1974. In it: my parents, my grandmother, my aunt, my brothers and me.

10/25/2010 ***This is the picture I took 11 seconds after David took yesterday's picture with me in it :) Have a happy Monday, everybody!